Pophinbembarnbitminzen is a god.

It takes the form of a three thousand metre long, merciful fairy.

Pophinbembarnbitminzen created a top quark seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Pophinbembarnbitminzen, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Pophinbembarnbitminzen, it will have a low opinion of you.

Pophinbembarnbitminzen's most sacred site is Randers in Denmark.

Pophinbembarnbitminzen's Holy Commandments

1. Never look at dwarf planets.

2. Never feed lots of spinach to nematodes while wearing magenta scarves.

3. Never talk about eukaryotes.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Never think about ultrasonics near foxes while wearing turquoise ear rings and balancing nine nickel spheres on your legs.