Pogtarpgonduss is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, narcissistic horse.

Pogtarpgonduss created the universe six thousand years ago.

If you believe in Pogtarpgonduss, she will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Pogtarpgonduss, she will turn you into a small brown duck.

Pogtarpgonduss' most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Pogtarpgonduss' Holy Commandments

1. Run away from red porpoises, for they are unholy.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Never paint your feet turquoise.

4. Always obey Pogtarpgonduss' priests.

5. Pogtarpgonduss loves frogs, so they must be honoured.