Huglakmat is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely thin, all-knowing hamster.

Huglakmat created oxygen nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Huglakmat, she will make you lucky.

If you do not believe in Huglakmat, she will turn you into a plant.

Huglakmat's most sacred site is Pandamatenga in Botswana.

Huglakmat's Holy Commandments

1. Never hurt capybaras.

2. Always make sure there are no birds in a building before entering it.

3. Do not shave your chest.

4. Do not speak about oranges.

5. Never feed pineapples to tortoises while wearing brown shoes.