Hogratjop is a god.

It takes the form of a very thin, uncaring dugong.

Hogratjop created carbon seven quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Hogratjop, it will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Hogratjop, it will turn you into a sheep.

Hogratjop's most sacred site is Bertkow in Germany.

Hogratjop's Holy Commandments

1. Never eat cucumbers.

2. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

3. Respect your elders.

4. Do not keep nine doves in a large pit.

5. Put Hogratjop first in all things.