Fommutsitpogdab is a god.

She takes the form of an eight hundred metre long, slow jellyfish.

Fommutsitpogdab created life four million years ago.

If you believe in Fommutsitpogdab, she will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Fommutsitpogdab, she will sneak up behind you and tap you on the back.

Fommutsitpogdab's most sacred site is Metsimotlhabe in Botswana.

Fommutsitpogdab's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about the weak nuclear force near dolphins while wearing gray boots and balancing eight copper spheres on your legs.

2. Always help sick tapirs.

3. Retreat if seven great tits approach from the west.

4. Never eat green fruit.

5. Never talk about eagles.