Dogbon is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely heavy, merciful meerkat.

Dogbon created energy six billion years ago.

If you believe in Dogbon, he will celebrate by creating some planets.

If you do not believe in Dogbon, he will send four elderly elephants to rub you out.

Dogbon's most sacred site is Bokaa in Botswana.

Dogbon's Holy Commandments

1. Never leap near moths.

2. Always help seals in need.

3. Never talk about tortoises.

4. Always stare at clouds.

5. Do not commit murder.