Arnbogflan is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, narcissistic meerkat.

Arnbogflan created humankind eight trillion years ago.

If you believe in Arnbogflan, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Arnbogflan, she will torture you forever.

Arnbogflan's most sacred site is Mogonono in Botswana.

Arnbogflan's Holy Commandments

1. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.

2. Never feed cherries to cats while wearing skirts.

3. Always look after injured ducks.

4. Never talk about the weak nuclear force near otters while wearing violet shirts and balancing four carbon spheres on your head.

5. Do not take Arnbogflan's name in vain.