Saknarxem is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely fat, all-powerful beaver.

Saknarxem created viruses eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Saknarxem, it will grant all your wishes.

If you do not believe in Saknarxem, it will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Saknarxem's most sacred site is Ans in Denmark.

Saknarxem's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in pink rooms.

2. Never talk about ribonucleic acid.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Aardvarks are unholy and should not be approached.

5. Respect your elders.