Stanhanjin is a god.

It takes the form of a rotund, duplicitous fox.

Stanhanjin created bats five million years ago.

If you believe in Stanhanjin, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Stanhanjin, it will curse you and those you beget for all time.

Stanhanjin's most sacred site is Nuorgam in Finland.

Stanhanjin's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear blue skirts.

2. Never think about gravity near dolphins while wearing cyan kilts and balancing nine lead spheres on your feet.

3. Worship no other gods but Stanhanjin.

4. Never feed parsnips to snails while wearing scarves.

5. Erect eight aluminium sculptures of Stanhanjin on top of important buildings.