Busdosstagdogpiglarnpomtun is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, capable pig.

Busdosstagdogpiglarnpomtun created a quark two billion years ago.

If you believe in Busdosstagdogpiglarnpomtun, it will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Busdosstagdogpiglarnpomtun, it will send four elephants to rub you out.

Busdosstagdogpiglarnpomtun's most sacred site is Utti in Finland.

Busdosstagdogpiglarnpomtun's Holy Commandments

1. Do not shelter from rain as it is holy.

2. Run away from yellow manatees, for they are unholy.

3. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

4. Respect your elders.

5. Never eat bark.