Paggonyamgupmif is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, moody owl.

Paggonyamgupmif created carbon nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Paggonyamgupmif, it will remain indifferent to you.

If you do not believe in Paggonyamgupmif, it will destroy your favourite galaxy.

Paggonyamgupmif's most sacred site is Bodieve in England.

Paggonyamgupmif's Holy Commandments

1. Erect four titanium sculptures of Paggonyamgupmif on top of important buildings.

2. Always stare at clouds.

3. Learn nine new languages a year.

4. Never wear coats.

5. Tell all that you meet of the great power of Paggonyamgupmif.