Rotfunfumhamtarpquillcep is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, uncaring horse.

Rotfunfumhamtarpquillcep created an up quark seven thousand years ago.

If you believe in Rotfunfumhamtarpquillcep, he will grant your every wish.

If you do not believe in Rotfunfumhamtarpquillcep, he will be very unhappy.

Rotfunfumhamtarpquillcep's most sacred site is Ilmola in Finland.

Rotfunfumhamtarpquillcep's Holy Commandments

1. Do not listen to music.

2. Rotfunfumhamtarpquillcep loves geese, so they must be honoured.

3. Always help cats.

4. Never talk about quantum gravity.

5. Always treat sheep with great respect.