Likcedpak is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely fat, duplicitous gorilla.

Likcedpak created gold three hundred thousand years ago.

If you believe in Likcedpak, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Likcedpak, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Likcedpak's most sacred site is Iona in Scotland.

Likcedpak's Holy Commandments

1. Do not wear fawn clothing.

2. You must pray to Likcedpak five times a day.

3. Your children must be taught to worship Likcedpak.

4. Always wear brown.

5. Paint representations of planets on the walls of your dwelling place in violet.