Bopflowpang is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, astonishing alligator.

Bopflowpang created the Milkyway three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Bopflowpang, she will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Bopflowpang, she will turn you into a puffin.

Bopflowpang's most sacred site is Hongcun in China.

Bopflowpang's Holy Commandments

1. Never think about stars.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate goats.

3. Show mercy to disobedient children.

4. Your grandchildren must be taught to worship Bopflowpang.

5. Never wear coats.