Stigfemfum is a god.

He takes the form of an exceedingly fat, deceitful zebra.

Stigfemfum created Mount Everest five million years ago.

If you believe in Stigfemfum, he will celebrate by creating some galaxies.

If you do not believe in Stigfemfum, he will turn you into an amoeba.

Stigfemfum's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Stigfemfum's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a large silicon sculpture of Stigfemfum on top of all buildings.

2. Always obey Stigfemfum's priests.

3. Always help eagles.

4. Stigfemfum loves aardvarks, so they must be respected.

5. Hide if seven bats approach from the north.