Kadcumfatgilstan is a god.

She takes the form of a microscopic, humane wren.

Kadcumfatgilstan created humanity six million years ago.

If you believe in Kadcumfatgilstan, she will look favourably on your prayers.

If you do not believe in Kadcumfatgilstan, she will remove you from existence.

Kadcumfatgilstan's most sacred site is Letino in Italy.

Kadcumfatgilstan's Holy Commandments

1. Do not take Kadcumfatgilstan's name in vain.

2. Do not dye your hair yellow.

3. Never paint your head red.

4. Do not eat tomatoes.

5. Never laugh near pigs.