Ditboggar is a god.

He takes the form of a three hundred metre long, charitable newt.

Ditboggar created everything that exists nine trillion years ago.

If you believe in Ditboggar, he will give you a free moon.

If you do not believe in Ditboggar, he will turn you into a plant.

Ditboggar's most sacred site is Panormos in Greece.

Ditboggar's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Walk at least four thousand metres per day.

3. Never hurt swans.

4. Never paint your chest cyan.

5. Do not covet oxen.