Kintipmat is a god.

She takes the form of a massive, egotistical warg.

Kintipmat created a bottom quark five quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Kintipmat, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Kintipmat, she will destroy your favourite planet.

Kintipmat's most sacred site is Panayadikuppam in India.

Kintipmat's Holy Commandments

1. Do not eat garlic.

2. Erect a large titanium sculpture of Kintipmat on top of all buildings.

3. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

4. Do not fashion models of living things.

5. Never go into pink rooms.