Ligzendap is a god.

It takes the form of a galaxy-sized, omnipotent mongoose.

Ligzendap created parasitic wasps four thousand years ago.

If you believe in Ligzendap, it will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Ligzendap, it will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Ligzendap's most sacred site is Kardous in Egypt.

Ligzendap's Holy Commandments

1. Never play with disobedient children.

2. Never write about black holes.

3. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

4. Never talk about asteroids.

5. Never talk about rats.