Jadflabwig is a god.

It takes the form of a very small, unthinking crow.

Jadflabwig created oxygen six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jadflabwig, it will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Jadflabwig, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Jadflabwig's most sacred site is Daraina in Madagascar.

Jadflabwig's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if seven grasshopers approach from the west.

2. Always pray in complete darkness.

3. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

4. Never think about asteroids.

5. Do not keep nine capybaras in a large pit.