Kikbemwot is a god.

He takes the form of a five thousand metre long, duplicitous fly.

Kikbemwot created a bottom quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Kikbemwot, he will make you immortal.

If you do not believe in Kikbemwot, he will hide angry, poisonous spiders in your dwelling place.

Kikbemwot's most sacred site is Gassin in France.

Kikbemwot's Holy Commandments

1. Kikbemwot must be the most important thing in your life.

2. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Kikbemwot on top of all buildings.

3. Never think about quantum field theory.

4. Never feed beans to dogs while wearing shoes.

5. Always make sure there are no birds in a building before entering it.