Mitcudsit is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, pitiless weasel.

Mitcudsit created the planet Saturn seven million years ago.

If you believe in Mitcudsit, it will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Mitcudsit, it will have a low opinion of you.

Mitcudsit's most sacred site is Nanjie in China.

Mitcudsit's Holy Commandments

1. Mitcudsit loves eagles, so they must be respected.

2. Do not take Mitcudsit's name in vain.

3. Do not wear lead on your body.

4. Do not listen to music.

5. Never think about gravity near ants while wearing mauve coats and balancing three nickel spheres on your neck.