Sigsasgan is a god.

It takes the form of an extremely large, tranquil newt.

Sigsasgan created a down quark eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Sigsasgan, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Sigsasgan, it will turn you into a plant.

Sigsasgan's most sacred site is Finnmark in Norway.

Sigsasgan's Holy Commandments

1. Erect nine iron sculptures of Sigsasgan on top of important buildings.

2. Erect a large carbon sculpture of Sigsasgan on top of all buildings.

3. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

4. Hide from orange horses for they are unholy.

5. Never talk about archaea.