Vedcipbus is a god.

It takes the form of a very large, quiet bird.

Vedcipbus created a down quark nine million years ago.

If you believe in Vedcipbus, it will grant you five wishes.

If you do not believe in Vedcipbus, it will manifest in front of you.

Vedcipbus' most sacred site is Borolong in Botswana.

Vedcipbus' Holy Commandments

1. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

2. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Do not hurt doves.

5. Pray towards the west.