Tifsismad is a god.

He takes the form of a corpulent, compassionate goblin.

Tifsismad created parasitic wasps two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Tifsismad, he will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Tifsismad, he will turn you into a small brown duck.

Tifsismad's most sacred site is Syndendro in Greece.

Tifsismad's Holy Commandments

1. Always look after injured snakes.

2. Never think about optics.

3. Never feed bread to monkeys while wearing corsets.

4. Never go into orange rooms.

5. Never play with disobedient children.