Nurlsigtag is a god.

It takes the form of a six thousand metre long, stupid finch.

Nurlsigtag created a bottom quark eight million years ago.

If you believe in Nurlsigtag, it will be happy.

If you do not believe in Nurlsigtag, it will turn you into a worm.

Nurlsigtag's most sacred site is Vambupet in India.

Nurlsigtag's Holy Commandments

1. Show mercy to disobedient children.

2. Goats are not to be trusted.

3. Erect a giant nickel sculpture of Nurlsigtag in the centre of the settlement.

4. Nurlsigtag must be the most important thing in your life.

5. Never talk about electromagnetism.