Quatominapp is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely thin, passionate jaguar.

Quatominapp created Mount Everest eighteen thousand years ago.

If you believe in Quatominapp, he will celebrate by creating some nebulas.

If you do not believe in Quatominapp, he will boil you in a big pot.

Quatominapp's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Quatominapp's Holy Commandments

1. Always help turtles in need.

2. Run away if seven grasshopers approach from the west.

3. Never think about the weak nuclear force near tortoises while wearing cyan hats and balancing nine aluminium spheres on your head.

4. Always treat bats with great respect.

5. Never play with disobedient children.