Yakmifmil is a god.

It takes the form of a fat, benevolent lion.

Yakmifmil created a quark three million years ago.

If you believe in Yakmifmil, it will be very happy.

If you do not believe in Yakmifmil, it will turn you into a sheep.

Yakmifmil's most sacred site is Valdena in Italy.

Yakmifmil's Holy Commandments

1. Always look both ways before crossing roads.

2. Never hop near birds.

3. Never feed lots of nuts to hamsters while wearing white kilts.

4. Never mention frogs.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.