Larndidsawrullnibfenrawpark is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, stupid penguin.

Larndidsawrullnibfenrawpark created humankind eight million years ago.

If you believe in Larndidsawrullnibfenrawpark, she will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Larndidsawrullnibfenrawpark, she will say rude things about you at parties.

Larndidsawrullnibfenrawpark's most sacred site is Issigeac in France.

Larndidsawrullnibfenrawpark's Holy Commandments

1. Pray towards the east.

2. Never think about dark energy.

3. Do not keep three birds in a large pit.

4. Hide if four otters approach from the south.

5. Do not fashion models of living things.