Padnutwon Likcudweepom is a god.

She takes the form of a very heavy, wise lizard.

Padnutwon Likcudweepom created energy eight quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Padnutwon Likcudweepom, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Padnutwon Likcudweepom, she will name a particularly small and pointless comet after you.

Padnutwon Likcudweepom's most sacred site is Dumadumana in Botswana.

Padnutwon Likcudweepom's Holy Commandments

1. Put Padnutwon Likcudweepom first in all things.

2. Never sprint in holy places.

3. Never feed aubergines to bats while wearing gray hats.

4. Never go into pink rooms.

5. Never think about amino acids.