Rulsabbest is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely small, unsympathetic lizard.

Rulsabbest created matter nine billion years ago.

If you believe in Rulsabbest, she will ignore you.

If you do not believe in Rulsabbest, she will ignore you and hope you go away.

Rulsabbest's most sacred site is Aguaruto in Mexico.

Rulsabbest's Holy Commandments

1. Always help bats.

2. Respect rivers and do not attempt to bridge them.

3. Rulsabbest must be the most important thing in your life.

4. Never talk about the strong nuclear force near eagles while wearing indigo shorts and balancing three titanium spheres on your back.

5. Never go into turquoise rooms.