Flismigbarn is a god.

He takes the form of an extremely large, humorless cow.

Flismigbarn created an atom two million years ago.

If you believe in Flismigbarn, he will ignore you forever.

If you do not believe in Flismigbarn, he will throw large rocks at you.

Flismigbarn's most sacred site is Dommerby in Denmark.

Flismigbarn's Holy Commandments

1. Always stare at clouds.

2. Do not kill squirrels.

3. Never pour water over plants.

4. Always pray in complete darkness.

5. Feed all hungry swans.