Nellrulkin is a god.

It takes the form of an one thousand metre long, irritating bee.

Nellrulkin created matter three billion years ago.

If you believe in Nellrulkin, it will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Nellrulkin, it will have a low opinion of you.

Nellrulkin's most sacred site is Kerris in England.

Nellrulkin's Holy Commandments

1. You must pray to Nellrulkin three times a day.

2. Always make a point of helping unfortunate doves.

3. Hide from brown aardvarks for they are unholy.

4. Nellrulkin loves porpoises, so they must be respected.

5. Always wear turquoise.