Botren is a god.

She takes the form of a nine thousand metre long, unthoughtful dove.

Botren created vertebrates three thousand years ago.

If you believe in Botren, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Botren, she will hide angry queen hornets in your dwelling place.

Botren's most sacred site is Ifaty in Madagascar.

Botren's Holy Commandments

1. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

2. Never talk about enzymes.

3. Never run in the presence of snails.

4. Never wear yellow stockings.

5. Radishes are unclean and should not be eaten.