Arfstaflarp is a god.

It takes the form of a slender, merciless meerkat.

Arfstaflarp created the Sunflower Galaxy eight billion years ago.

If you believe in Arfstaflarp, it will look after you all your life.

If you do not believe in Arfstaflarp, it will turn you into a giant snail.

Arfstaflarp's most sacred site is Pontelandolfo in Italy.

Arfstaflarp's Holy Commandments

1. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

2. Never think about fluid mechanics near squirrels while wearing black shorts and balancing five iron spheres on your head.

3. Always wear red.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Never talk about special relativity near ants while wearing gray dresses and balancing nine nickel spheres on your chest.