Tofnib is a god.

She takes the form of a very small, unthinking weasel.

Tofnib created Africa three million years ago.

If you believe in Tofnib, she will give you a free planet.

If you do not believe in Tofnib, she will turn you into a sheep.

Tofnib's most sacred site is Buskerud in Norway.

Tofnib's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Ponytails are unholy and must not be worn.

3. Do not shave your head.

4. Run away if eight whales approach from the west.

5. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.