Cussjenstaf is a god.

She takes the form of a corpulent, egotistical cobra.

Cussjenstaf created the Cigar Galaxy four billion years ago.

If you believe in Cussjenstaf, she will grant your every desire.

If you do not believe in Cussjenstaf, she will name a particularly small and pointless dust cloud after you.

Cussjenstaf's most sacred site is Kgope in Botswana.

Cussjenstaf's Holy Commandments

1. Never wear cyan stockings.

2. Erect a giant red sculpture of Cussjenstaf in the centre of the settlement.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Never skip in the presence of squirrels.

5. Never eat green fruit.