Butbafflapdavbet is a god.

She takes the form of an enormous, staggering spider.

Butbafflapdavbet created life two quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Butbafflapdavbet, she will give you lots of gold.

If you do not believe in Butbafflapdavbet, she will turn you into an amoeba.

Butbafflapdavbet's most sacred site is Diebzig in Germany.

Butbafflapdavbet's Holy Commandments

1. Put Butbafflapdavbet first in all things.

2. Butbafflapdavbet loves shrews, so they must be honoured.

3. Do not drink alcohol.

4. Never talk about enzymes.

5. Always treat cats with great respect.
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