Natyokrul is a god.

It takes the form of a plump, impressive bear.

Natyokrul created a bottom quark six trillion years ago.

If you believe in Natyokrul, it will give you great power.

If you do not believe in Natyokrul, it will not invite you to parties.

Natyokrul's most sacred site is Qangwa in Botswana.

Natyokrul's Holy Commandments

1. Do not covet oxen.

2. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

3. Walk at least five thousand metres per day.

4. Your children must be taught to worship Natyokrul.

5. Do not take Natyokrul's name in vain.