Mum is a god.

It takes the form of a five hundred metre long, sapient duck.

Mum created oxygen six quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mum, it will grant you eternal life.

If you do not believe in Mum, it will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.

Mum's most sacred site is Sarti in Greece.

Mum's Holy Commandments

1. Do not chop down trees.

2. Doors are unholy and should not be erected.

3. Put Mum first in all things.

4. Run away from brown eagles, for they are unholy.

5. Always take life seriously.