Bigbot is a god.

She takes the form of a very fat, unfair grasshopper.

Bigbot created the cosmos seven million years ago.

If you believe in Bigbot, she will approve.

If you do not believe in Bigbot, she will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Bigbot's most sacred site is Glastonbury Tor in England.

Bigbot's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if three birds approach from the south.

2. Retreat if seven sheep approach from the east.

3. Pray towards the west.

4. Bigbot loves geese, so they must be respected.

5. Learn five new languages a year.