Safhapsog is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, humorless yak.

Safhapsog created a quark eight thousand years ago.

If you believe in Safhapsog, she will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Safhapsog, she will turn you into a puffin.

Safhapsog's most sacred site is Altata in Mexico.

Safhapsog's Holy Commandments

1. Do not commit murder.

2. You must never eat rice.

3. Erect three titanium sculptures of Safhapsog on top of important buildings.

4. Never wear white shoes.

5. Treat sacred texts with the utmost of respect.