Jopdamdiss is a god.

He takes the form of a very large, moody bird.

Jopdamdiss created humanity two trillion years ago.

If you believe in Jopdamdiss, he will answer your prayers.

If you do not believe in Jopdamdiss, he will think nothing of it.

Jopdamdiss' most sacred site is Snipp in Sweden.

Jopdamdiss' Holy Commandments

1. Always pray immersed in water.

2. Never think ill of sick goats.

3. Never feed lots of lentils to badgers while wearing fawn stockings.

4. Pray towards the east.

5. Never think about dark energy near foxes while wearing black boots and balancing eight copper spheres on your hands.