Lakvagmab is a god.
She takes the form of a corpulent, irritating
hedgehog.
Lakvagmab created the planet Mars two trillion years ago.
If you believe in
Lakvagmab, she will give you lots of grapes.
If you do not believe in
Lakvagmab, she will hide angry, poisonous snakes in your dwelling place.
Lakvagmab's most sacred site is Burras in England.
Lakvagmab's Holy Commandments1. You must never eat garlic.
2. Do not covet oxen.
3. You must love Lakvagmab.
4. Never think about planets.
5. Retreat if six geese approach from the north.