Sugtikfabgomkikpomnutbug is a god.

He takes the form of a blubbery, all-powerful crow.

Sugtikfabgomkikpomnutbug created the planet Saturn three million years ago.

If you believe in Sugtikfabgomkikpomnutbug, he will approve.

If you do not believe in Sugtikfabgomkikpomnutbug, he will jump up and down on your head until it really hurts.

Sugtikfabgomkikpomnutbug's most sacred site is Qantir in Egypt.

Sugtikfabgomkikpomnutbug's Holy Commandments

1. Do not drink water in yellow rooms.

2. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.

3. Erect five titanium sculptures of Sugtikfabgomkikpomnutbug on top of important buildings.

4. Walk at least seven thousand metres per day.

5. Retreat if four bats approach from the south.