Mipvincit is a god.

She takes the form of an extremely heavy, irritating owl.

Mipvincit created humanity four quadrillion years ago.

If you believe in Mipvincit, she will be happy.

If you do not believe in Mipvincit, she will turn you into a frog.

Mipvincit's most sacred site is Bogogobo in Botswana.

Mipvincit's Holy Commandments

1. Always treat monkeys with great respect.

2. Birds are unholy and should not be approached.

3. Never eat bark.

4. Never think about electromagnetism near tapirs while wearing brown hats and balancing three copper spheres on your face.

5. Always take life seriously.