Ruttfomrill is a god.

She takes the form of a giant, impressive eagle.

Ruttfomrill created dark energy eight million years ago.

If you believe in Ruttfomrill, she will laugh at you.

If you do not believe in Ruttfomrill, she will make you grow a tail.

Ruttfomrill's most sacred site is Ulsted in Denmark.

Ruttfomrill's Holy Commandments

1. Do not imbibe mustard, for it is unholy.

2. Erect a large zinc sculpture of Ruttfomrill on top of all buildings.

3. Do not dye your hair purple.

4. Never mention doves.

5. Do not listen to music.