Dogquarthad is a god.

He takes the form of a microscopic, thoughtless whale.

Dogquarthad created the Sol system five billion years ago.

If you believe in Dogquarthad, he will grant you three wishes.

If you do not believe in Dogquarthad, he will denounce you as a heretic.

Dogquarthad's most sacred site is Faux Cap in Madagascar.

Dogquarthad's Holy Commandments

1. Erect a giant yellow sculpture of Dogquarthad in the centre of the settlement.

2. Always prostrate yourself in the presence of your elders.

3. Do not chop down trees.

4. Worship no other gods but Dogquarthad.

5. Do not speak about bread.