Wapvingep Satlidnib is a god.

She takes the form of a two thousand metre long, annoying skunk.

Wapvingep Satlidnib created gold three trillion years ago.

If you believe in Wapvingep Satlidnib, she will visit you to thank you.

If you do not believe in Wapvingep Satlidnib, she will curse you and those you beget for fifty two trillion years.

Wapvingep Satlidnib's most sacred site is Krina in Germany.

Wapvingep Satlidnib's Holy Commandments

1. Hide if nine hamsters approach from the west.

2. Do not bounce in public.

3. Cucumbers are unclean and must never pass your lips.

4. Do not hurt voles.

5. Do not drink from vessels made of earth.