Xenquatraw is a god.

She takes the form of an eight thousand metre long, slow shark.

Xenquatraw created the planet Earth eight million years ago.

If you believe in Xenquatraw, she will grant you immortality.

If you do not believe in Xenquatraw, she will jump up and down fuming with rage.

Xenquatraw's most sacred site is Dornbock in Germany.

Xenquatraw's Holy Commandments

1. Never paint your head red.

2. Xenquatraw must be the most important thing in your life.

3. Always pray in complete darkness.

4. Do not drink alcohol.

5. Never write about the weak nuclear force.